Which for those of you who don't know what that is is Obsessive Control Disorder and I have it in a BAD way! I went to the MD yesterday and she started me on a new medication that should help in a few weeks. I can't stand the thoughts that keep going through my mind over and over and over.
Here is an example of my mind the past week. Katie's teacher was sick on Tuesday. Katie came home from school on Tuesday saying her teacher had a stomach ache and felt like she was going to throw up. I immediately went into panic mode. If Katie picks up what her teacher has, then she could give it to Gillian, who is going back to school on Sunday.
For those of you who don't know, the week before finals, Gillian caught a bug and was in the hospital for 4 days. She has no large intestine because of an illness she had when she was younger, so when she gets a stomach bug, it turns into a BIG thing requiring hospitalization. So, you can imagine my panic. I am trying to inforce hand washing and keeping the girls apart. I am thinking that Katie would have come down with this bug by now, because the net says that it usually presents itself between 24-48 hours which we are past now. I will feel much better tomorrow if she doesn't get it. And the nurse at the MD's office said that the chance of Gillian getting it are even smaller than Katie.
Does that help? Nope! Still runs around my mind over and over and over again. Can I do anything about it? Nope! Do I know this? Yes! Does it matter? Nope! And if it wasn't this, it would be something else.
So, I start the new med tonight and will go up for the next few weeks until I go back to the MD again. If there are no adverse effects, then I will go up to the recommended dose. The only thing that sucks is that it could be a month or more before I feel/relief. ARGH! I want it gone NOW!
So, I am trying to read as much as possible and not let things bother me. The more I sleep and watch TV, the better I feel.
There you have it...I have OCD!