Sunday, May 13, 2007

Bad, bad blogger

I know. I have been bad. I have to come right out and admit that I have been seriously depressed. So depressed that it has affected my family and friends. I don't know when it started, but I imagine it was the surgery that threw me overboard. I didn't have a good outcome. I saw my surgeon last week and he is saying that he suspects that one of the screws or rods is pressing on a nerve and that is what is making my leg hurt so badly. I can barely drive, still have to walk with a cane and can't afford physical therapy. I also can no longer work. I am so, so depressed over the thought of giving up my career. I have been a social worker all my life and to hear the MD say that I will have to give that up has been the most depressing thing of all. I just can't sit for an hour at a time any more.

I have to believe that something good is coming my way. I have good friends who have helped us out and all of my blogging buddies have always been there for me/us. Financially we are getting by. But it's just one more frustration. One that seems to have Cheryl and I arguing more and more. I hate money. I hate not having enough and I hate that it controls my life so much.

I am putting my trust in God. He will provide. He always has.


Shari said...

Now that ended in a positive!! God will always be there thru everything you are going thru.
BTW - Happy Mother's Day! What a great moment to stop and say thank you for the beautiful daughters you have - remember when they said you coulnd't have children - Well they are real proof that God exists for you -Depression is sooo overrated- don't let the word take over your life- It's only a word the attitude comes from within not from a word - Love ya kiddo! Shari

amanda said...

Happy Mother's Day my friend. You weren't kidding when you said we were going through the same things. I pray each night and I secretly wish a miracle would wipe out the large amounts of debt we have. Sigh.. xo